Friday, October 1, 2010

I'm gonna Shanghai you


It's like a bread line for the train! I wish this poster had been out a few months back when I saw red and threatened to cut a bitch (all in my head of course) when she tried to nudge me off the tracks. In fact, I think Tokyo Metro should market and sell a pack of yellow cards with the manner posters printed on them. I would carry them around in my purse for ease of reference so that whenever I spot a violation, I can pull the relevant one out and "yellow card" the offending party. I would do this while giving them my best "back off bitch" eyes.

I'm feeling rather groovy about this month's poster, possibly because I didn't have to see it this morning because I BIKED to work! Now that I have finally found a fairly non-populated route and my ass has stopped feeling like I just had anal sex for ten hours straight, things are looking waaaay up in the commuting department. I almost want to laugh maniacally as I buzz by on my bike because it feels so ridiculously good to be on it (but not in a bad anal sex to good anal sex way), pesky pedestrians and all.

I'm feeling so good about this month's poster, in fact, that my first reaction on seeing it was that we should all just make like we're in China, since that's what everyone is itching to do anyway. I just got back from a little exploratory voyage to Shanghai and I am so over the passive aggressive behaviour here - give me aggressive rock-out-with-your-cock-out craziness any day. The Shanghainese have no qualms about putting it all out there and rushing into that train before anyone can blink, and after seeing some similar behaviour here in Tokyo, I think it's time to drop the facade Tokyoites. Although there is the slight problem of comparing the Japanese to the Chinese; I think it could be one of the worst insults out there to a Japanese person. Take for example, exhibit A: I want the beau to stop spitting outside, so I tell him he is acting just like they do in China. Fastest behavioral turnaround I. have. ever. seen. For reals though, let's start gunning for it like they do in China.

7 comments:

Elaine said...

Good point there on the passive/aggressive. Yes, let's just get it right out there.

I kind of think Mr. Creepy looks as if he's goosing the person in front of him...am I wrong?

Apryl in Wonderland said...

Hmmm...and exactly what has one been doing to know / reference the sore booty from bike riding feeling similar to 10 hours of anal sex?

I think some previous blog posts are misasing?! ;)

Green-Eyed Geisha said...

Elaine: Thank you for introducing me to that wonderful terminology! He looks like he's doing something he shouldn't be doing with that furtive over-the-shoulder-glance!

Apryl: Touche! We may never know :)

Lisa said...

Haha! Hey, I was wondering about your bike... when you sit on it, do your feet touch the ground? I bought a bike last year after not having one for like 15 years, and my toes just barely touch the ground. Is the bike too tall or are they all like this? The seat is as far down as they go. I also get quite a pounding from it. UGH.

Green-Eyed Geisha said...

Lisa: Mine juuust touch the ground in flats with an accompanying "wedgie" feeling. My bike has a small frame though, so I have the seat set higher than it could be. From riding more legit bikes back home, I get the feeling that most people can't comfortably stand flat on the ground while being completely on the seat...but I have no idea really. I was always worried about landing on my vajayjay on the straight bar when riding boy bikes haha.

Lisa said...

Ok, I feel a little better about mine now. Maybe I'll pull it out of the shed and take it for a spin this weekend!

Green-Eyed Geisha said...

Lisa: Do it! Fall is perfect for being outside!